Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize
