The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
