Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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