You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
