So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Everclear isn't food dammit
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
