yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
