Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
