Is it normal to miss your booty call?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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