see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
