ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
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