Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
