Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
