You're a womanizer and a bitch.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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