told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
