I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
