she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
