Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
