love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
