Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
