that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
