I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Randomize
