Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
