this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
