at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Buhtt sex?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
