sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize