no. you can't hotbox the world.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
