i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize