he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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