There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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