My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
