We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
