Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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