i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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