I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Fuck appropriateness.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
