I look better un-naked...
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
