Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize