you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
