So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
