Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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