You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize