dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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