Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
