Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
