so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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