We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
