The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
