names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
