You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I bet he comes in French.
Fuck appropriateness.
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
