Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So many bounce houses so little time
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
