But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
where are my pants?
in the oven.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
